desired dreams
Thursday, January 31, 2002
53 points
Yahoo! you go! Kinkiness is one thing you're good at, but you're not the best, you've still got more to do yet!
[take the KinkyLadies quiz yourself]
XD````````````````````````` ohohoho.
dum dee dum. i'm at work right now. yay. the post man came in early. and there are ants all over here... ewwwwwwwwwww. gross. =3
Tuesday, January 29, 2002
ooooooooookay. i'm back.. just got back from Sausolito, TMMC and learning about Ceteations... aka whales, porpises and dolphins. The COOL mammals. XD any way... so i'm going to go off ranting in never never land again. =O but yeah. i dont know. my emotions have been going up and down.. up and down... and it sucks. my parents are continuously bugging me about Sig now... "He's a gentleman, he paied for dinner, where did u guys go? what did u talk about?" and bullshit like that. i dont know. -_-;
but honestly, i miss him now... i guess i got so depressed on the fact that i couldn't spend that extra time with him that makes me miss him so much more. i miss him in band class... cuz that just owns. =D but i'm really happy that i did get to spend time with him. iono. he dances silly tho. ;P heehee. but it's all good. any way, i'm so tired... i should take a shower. =O i have to do some drafting homework too. blegh. i dont wanna. but yeah. my parents are continuously bother me about him... and i'm like.. "Get over it... leave me the fawk alone... -_-" its not fun. and no i'm not cheating. i still love you ross. i mean... getting back from formal... i started missin Sig... but then again i started missing Ross EVEN more. -_-; its like... i haven't seen him in hella weeks... v-day is comming up too. yeah. iono what else to say. duuuur. i'm so dumb. i got rejected as an early applicant to Cal Poly SLO. yay! go me! it just says... I'm dumb. the end. -_-; this sucks. okay. i think i will go take a shower.... i listened to the chem. bro cd on the way down to TMMC... it owns... and owns and owns... and so does me and my... =3``` lots of things own me now and these days.
gosh. i havent blogged in so long. i'm at work right now. jeez. its been such a buzy week! and this weekend will be busy too! >_< yeah. i've been on a Me & My obessive rampage. I wrote my Golden State Exam (English) on Me & My. well the test itself was hella dumb! it was like, "If you could spend a day w/ a fictional/historical character, who would it be and why?" stupid i say. so i wrote about Me & My sure... they ain't historical... but they are in Denmark! they won awards in DK y0. and i rambled on about them. XD```
yeah these past days have been HELLA ups and downs. -_-; not fun. i guess ever since formal... i've been going up and down emotionally. argh. i hate it. and i cry. and i cry like a little girl... but i don't blame myself... i blame others. isnt that selfish of me? (if u say yes... then please... go away! =P mai blog!!! >_<) argh. i'm stuck at work doing returns right now... >_<;;;;;;;;;;;; it sucks. last week i got a big fatty cut from the damn skissors. >_<; yeah. so here i am... i'm half bloggin and half returning... i wonder how long it will take for me to finish all this sheit.
but on the way from work i stopped by Best Buy. I got the new chemical bro. cd. and a new pair of headphones. all i can say about the chem. bro new cd is...
IT OWNS ME
for realz! I love the afrika song. it's just really cool... it's been so long since the last cd. the only catch is... its really short. =( only 10 songs man. yeah.my formal was nice... i got to go with Sig. um yeah. so how do i explain all of this? i'm not so sure. like. let me think here. so soph. yr at high skoo i met this guy in band class. he was a horn playa too. ^^: his name is Sig. =D so yeah, that year was really cool, getting to know him and such. then he graduated. =( any way, to make things short, during those two years I've been having dreams... i've had at least two... and they were almost the same. I had this dream i went to my winter forml with him. (Note: WINTER FORMAL... not prom... not anything else). any way... i asked him last year, and he didn't get to go. =( well anyway.. a year past by... and i've got a guy. but i still had those dreams... so i asked ross if he mind... and he said no. i was excited. ^_^ so i went off and emailed Sig and asked if he could go... and he said yes! I was so joyful... its like... this: *heart flutters and flys to heaven* any way... i had such a great time at formal. i guess it was a "live the moment" kind of thing.
my formal outline:
- got back from sf
- went online
- got phone call from Sig, says going to pick me up at 7-7:15 pm and eat at Mistral
- get picked up and go to Mistral
- eat... yummi =D I ate Mushroom Gnoochi and he ate Salmon and Spicy Seafood Chowder. =D
- go to the dance
- go dance, take pics, etc
- slow dance... XD he's so tall.
- dance finishes
- go to my friends house for like... 15 minutes
- and he takes me home.
i asked my parents if i could have stayed out longer, but they said no. -_- it HELLA sucked. i wanted to stay out later w/ him. but my mom was being a b*tch and said no. -_-; then my dad said i could, but i was like fawk it. i'm not going to put up w/ more sheit. anyway... when i did come back... i got two hugs... ^_^ made me feel so warm inside... and then... he left. and there i was back in reality again. i was living a dream. and when i got home... i knew it was all over... so i took my time putting my shoes away... and walking back upstair, and when i got back... everyone was wide awake with their tails wagging in the air wanting to hear all about it. i mean fawk... i got HELLA depressed and walked straight into my room. and then. it hit. like. BOOM. for realz. my mom got angry with me and asked if i was depressed... WELL FUCK. you'd imagine i'd get depressed... WHY? cuz she got angry at me and wouldn't even let me out. -_-;; hella sucked so mucho. i said nothing was wrong and to leave me the fuck alone. i'll write later. gotta go.
Sunday, January 27, 2002
CRAZY - Me & My
Why do I keep on writing
All these love songs
Why can´t I get you out of my head
Everyday when I wake up
I try to be strong
But you got that something I can´t forget
And it´s driving me mad
`Cause I know that you love me
And I know one day you will finally see
That we were meant to be
My baby
Don´t you know you´re driving me crazy
Can´t you see that I am your lady
My baby
You´ve been playing with my heart lately
I´m begging you to come back and save me
My baby, my baby
Why do I keep on crying, when I know it is wrong
Why can´t I just forget what we had
Since the day that we broke up
I try to move on
But you got that something I can´t forget
And it´s making me sad
Cause I know that you love me
And I know how much you´re denying to see
That we were meant to be
My baby
Don´t you know you´re driving me crazy
Can´t you see that I am your lady
My baby
You´ve been playing with my heart lately
I´m begging you to come back and save me
My baby, my baby
Now I pray every night
To get over you
But it´s just so hard
When I know that we are not through
We are not through
My baby
Don´t you know you´re driving me crazy
Can´t you see that I am your lady
My baby
You´ve been playing with my heart lately
I´m begging you to come back and save me
My baby, my baby
Thursday, January 24, 2002
Emperor Palpatine
Sure, you're the most powerful man in the galaxy. But you're old and ugly, and your back must be killing you.
Take the Imperial Test at Bucketheads!
Sunday, January 13, 2002
I am a hip critter. I showed up fasionably late with Super Mario World and have started launching your own career since then. In maybe 10-15 years, my popularity will rival Mario's. Not that I'm competing with him. He's my bud. I'm good at getting and keeping friends, and they value me for that. After all, who else would carry them on their back through ice, fire, and rain? Sometimes I think I'm taken for granted, but I know that my friends have my back. Of course they do. Who would screw over Yoshi?
Saturday, January 12, 2002
laadeedah. i'm so tired. =O i was at the marine mammal center for docent trainning today. Gosh! from 10am till 4pm... but i gets a shirt! yay!! ^^; i'm so excited... i got to see the sea lions and sea otters again! i hope dey life. T_T; it would suck to see them die. =( necropancy is STINKY. nuff said. n e way, i'm not gonna sum up wut we did.. but we learned about elephant seals, sea lions, harbor seals... etc. =D ask me for info! heehee. okay i'm going to go. i need to work on a new blog layout... and i've been too lazy to do it. =3
Thursday, January 10, 2002
so tired. i'm planning on making a new blog layout. but i dont know yet... more info soon to come. =3
Wednesday, January 09, 2002
v a m p usako: i like that. =3
v a m p usako: major sentence revamp time! *pulls out magic keyboard wand* MAAAGIIIIIIIIIIIC SENNNNNNNNTAAAAANCE CHAAAAANGE!!!
v a m p usako: XD
Eris405: lol
Eris405: sentai anime....hehehe...
v a m p usako: tooooooooo mucho energy
v a m p usako: but my eyes are like... baggy
v a m p usako: =3
Eris405: or maybe magical girl...
v a m p usako: =3
Eris405: maho bishoujo usa-chan! defender of syntax and sentence structure! bwahahaha
v a m p usako: i'm yuna
v a m p usako: x_X''
ManekiNekoJAS: hehe
ManekiNekoJAS: i bet you i'd be rikku
v a m p usako: =3
v a m p usako: i'd rather be rikku or lulu
ManekiNekoJAS: yeah
ManekiNekoJAS: but actually
v a m p usako: u notice they're all 2 syllable names
ManekiNekoJAS: i see you as yuna
ManekiNekoJAS: i wanna be kihmari
ManekiNekoJAS: lol
v a m p usako: rik-ku, lu-lu, yu-na, wak-ka, tid-us
v a m p usako: except for kihmari
v a m p usako: =3
ManekiNekoJAS: kih-ma-ri
v a m p usako: doh
v a m p usako: he ruins it all >_<
ManekiNekoJAS: lol
ManekiNekoJAS: au-ron
v a m p usako: yeah
v a m p usako: i like him
v a m p usako: he's hot. =3
ManekiNekoJAS: ur right kimahri ruins it lol
ManekiNekoJAS: yeah he is
ManekiNekoJAS: =D
v a m p usako: LOL
v a m p usako: Auron is a turn-on
v a m p usako: hahahaha
ManekiNekoJAS: LOL
Sunday, January 06, 2002
ugh. i'm feelin so down. i always am arn't i? i guess i could consider myself a gothic girl... you goddamn sterotype-er people who think that all goths are depressed people... ~_~; i hate it. ugh. makes me feel so yukky. ugh. so yesterday... was sorta fun. we went to svgl.. i played some usual stuff PIU, DM4th, DMX, yanno. and then Ross took me out to Yoshinoiya(sp???) and i took Birdie along w/ me. did i ever mention Ross bought me birdie? its kyute. den we went to lolliecup and i got some stuff. it wasnt too bad. and den after he took me to meet up w/ my dad and bro at old navy... i made him try clothing on... and they were too big on him. =3 and too baggy =3```` and lemmie see... thats when it happened.
i'm a depressive girl, and i don't take the drugs to make me happy. but... when you get everyone telling you, "Stop seeing your man b/c its driving everyone off a fucking cliff, esp. your family... you goddamn spoiled lil brat..." you can't help but fall into depression. i was mad, angry, depressed, sad... the usual. violent angered depression. and i left. i was upset. i'm really thinkin about giving up on this relationship thing... when you want to love someone... and everyone even your mate believes that what you do to be with that person thinks its just too much... it makes you want to give up. i dont know. god someone save me. i later came home from that mess... thinking about how he just left... he left... in a car. and left. me alone out there at old navy up against the wall, in a little ball staring out into the world angry and depressed... and he left. -_- i dont know what to make out of it, how to take it. i give up, it was a sign of like... you're too much, your a brat... that kind of thing. maybe i am? maybe i'm not. but later i get home... and kim i got yer postcards! and i read..."...i've learned that when you're happy, everyone else is... so you've got to be happy" and i'm thinking.. goddamn. everything that makes me happy isn't allowed on the phucking face of the earth. i'm not allowed to love. i'm not allowed to be happy. what does one do in the names sake of love, of happiness? i don't know what to do... but sulk and be angry at the world.
Friday, January 04, 2002
goooooooood evening. hRm. i'm bored so i'm gonna blog. =D
i need to fix my subprofile in aim. yeah. o_O;;;;
people in #ddrfreak on karma.otherside.com are immature mean people. =O nuff said.
yesterday me, kevin, and daniel went to san fran to meet up w/ kevin's friend... Jeska! (jessica) she's so wonderful! We had lots of fun! =D we went to the metreon... got tickets to see the new beauty and the beast on imax, then we went to japantown... and ate SUSHI. we went to isabune. fun fun fun. =O and den we went to mikado, and other random stores... i was planning on buying cd's... but i ended up getting manga!!!
I've fallen in love with Gunsmith Cats again.
I can't believe, just reading it makes me want to read it again and again and again. The TBP Mister V came out.. and it was soooooo good. after i finished it.. it made me feel warm inside. it was damn good. and it cost me. $18.95 >_< But i also found the japanese manga! It's all good now =D i picked up the japanese version of bean bandit and mr v.
after going to kinokuniya, we went to the stationary store, i bought lots of stuff =3 and after that we went sticky pic happy! XD we took so many! they have totoro sticky pics! =O and yeah... and then i went back to the stationary store... and bought these booklets for sticky pics! thanku jeska for telling me about them! ^_^ they're like mini sticker books! heeheehee!! I am happi lyke whut. and den we went to the grocerie store... =D i bought candy, food, drinks... C.C. Grape owns me. =D tanku. so yeah. after dat we took the bus back to downtown sf... ran around in the SF mall... o_O; and den we went back to the metreon and watched the movie... den we went to the ATG... and on the way daniel saw my compu teacher Mr. Clark. talk about weird. =O``` after that we were hungri and we ate at max's yummi. but the service was kinda bad... and den we took jeska to get picked up by her parents... and she went bye bye... just like that... *sniff* but i emailed her asap! it was mucho fun! ^_^; and we took the train back... and i just about fell asleep0rs. and i should be doing homework... but i'm not. but i should go. heeheehee. yeah. i thought i'd blog about it first tho. =O and yeah.
sighs... and soon school starts... this monday! noooooooooooooooooo! see ya'll back in skoo.
btw, camera wars are fun! XD i'll have pics up sometime soon.. i gotta finish off my camera and develop the rest of them. =O
Tuesday, January 01, 2002
ManekiNekoJAS: funniest limit break ever
ManekiNekoJAS: aurons
ManekiNekoJAS: shooting star
v a m p usako: o______O
v a m p usako: /me watches shooting star play XD
ManekiNekoJAS: hits the enemy and they fly into the distance, instant kill
ManekiNekoJAS: it's so funny
v a m p usako: O_O
ManekiNekoJAS: they're like WHEEEEE!
ManekiNekoJAS: lol
v a m p usako: O_O
v a m p usako: bang da boo bang =D
ManekiNekoJAS: hehe
ManekiNekoJAS: like a shooting star, across the midnight sky, they will fly *flyfly..* then they will die... *aurons version of shooting star XD*
v a m p usako: ROTFLMAO
ManekiNekoJAS: aurons like too powerful o.o
v a m p usako: /me posts it on my blog. =D
Truly, Madly, Deeply...
By Savage Garden
I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish, I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope, I'll be your love be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath truly madly deeply do...
I will be strong I will be faithful 'cause I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living. A deeper meaning.
I want to stand with you on the mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...
And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish send it to heaven then make you want to cry...
The tears of joy for all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of...
The hightest power. In lonely hours. The tears devour you...
I want to stand with you on the mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...
Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes, 'cause its standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...
I'll be your dream. I'll be your wish. I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope. I'll be your love be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath truly madly deeply do...
I want to stand with you on a mountain......
happy new year to ya all... as i still sit here 1 in the morning... i think about the one i love. i'm so happy my love called. I get to start the new year off sleeping wonderfully in bed... knowing that someone cares for me, and its someone i hold dear in mai heart. ^_^; *is happy*
oooh! more news! I raided me&my's website... and i read they're planning on releasing a 4th album! I'm soooo excited! i truly hearts them. no one understands that i really love the group. i honestly will bust of money to go to europe and see them live in concert if i was promised tickets... *sighs* i still want that fly high vinal. =O
and noting that song above... thats how i feel. Ross... thats what i want to be to you. I want to be your dreams, your wish and your fantasy. I love you! thank you so much for pulling me through another year of life. and esp thank you to all those special friends who've helped me live another year. you know who you are. ^-^; my ddr friends, my school friends... and my tabby cat. XD
did i tell ya? Ross = Tabby cat! =O his new hair cut! XD
and he bought me a penguin from target... okay so its a dog chew toy... but its KYUTE. i couldnt stop hugging it! and den we watched monsters inc and saw "For the Birds" by Pixar! and i couldnt STOP LAUGHING!!! that penguin means something to me now... every time it gets sqeezed it squeeks... and i think of that short flik. XD hahahaha. i downloaded the short film too. makes me happy. ^______^; i worked some more on that lilneko site... comming along well! i still have the blog to work on. but jas and i decided to use maneki nekos as pictures! XD hahahaha. so yeah. i guess i'd better be going. my head feels funni... i think i had a lil too much to drink.
i onlee had 3 glass of wine. XD
now listenin to // savage garden - truly madly deeply
